I KNOW, RIGHT? We are the worst.
We kept this one super quiet. SUPER quiet.
- When we were at the CPFC this past November I was meeting all these wonderful Canadian bloggers while I was 9 weeks pregnant and rushing to the bathroom with nausea at the same time. We totally bailed on the after party because I was still falling asleep at like 9pm most nights and that weekend was a long one.
- When I wrote about planning for baby and I shared some tips about bumping up your grocery fund, how to figure out taxes and maternity leave in Canada it was because I was going through and trying to figure them out myself.
I know we are the worst.
Why Didn’t We Share Until This Moment?
Mostly for fear something would happen even late in the game and then having to deal with publicly talking about it. I spent the first 5 months being super stressed that something was going to go wrong and this amazing thing was going to get removed from our lives. So talking about it publicly probably would just have added more fuel to the fire. Also I was still dealing with horrible morning sickness up until that point.
And then it was one PF person after another who was announcing their pregnancy and I was just thought “well maybe I should just wait it out a little longer before we say anything”. So we waited. Maybe too long, like so many other things in our life. That can’t be changed now.
Regardless we have been doing tons of prepping behind the scenes to prep for this little one.
We finished our basement for extra storage space, we (Scott) painted all of the rooms in our house including our new office/nursery combination room, we bought baby clothes and have been figuring out future costs and expenses.
No matter how much we prepare our lives are going to change so much in the next couple of weeks. It’s actually pretty scary if I’m being honest.
The biggest change for me personally is going to be not going into work every day. This is something that is been on my mind for a bit. I have been so use to contributing a ton to an organization that I’m concerned how I’m going to feel at home everyday. With giving birth I know that priority #1 is keeping a person alive. I’m very tired now and getting to the office everyday has been a challenge but working at the same place for 9 years and on the same team for the last 6 means I’m leaving a lot of people who I like, respect and enjoy working with. I’ll come in every now and then for a quick visit which makes me feel a little bit better.
What About the Money:
Another big change is going to be the money; not really stressed about money, just trying to figure out a new way to do things. It’s not going to be stressful because this was a planned decision to start a family. We planned this one out for 4 years. Yes, 4 years. From when we started saving money to when we will take our baby home with us will be 4 years. Since it was so long we were able to save and make sure that we can provide for baby and us in this first crazy year.
That might sound extreme but I was happy to have planned as well as we did. Since Scott was out of a job while I was 6 months pregnant (for only about 2 weeks) the biggest worry on my mind was trying find a way to nap at work during the day, being very hungry all the time and wondering if I was going to get an epidural. It was not having a meltdown about our mortgage, feel unable to provide for our unborn child or make it to the end of the month. No money stress whatsoever.
Privileged to Save:
Had there been times saving up that kind of money was hard? Yes but then again not really. We were trying to supplement my income with added expenses we knew nothing about. So that part was tricky. I also have a habit of feeling that it was never going to be enough so I kept wanting to increase the money that we were saving which didn’t always go over so well. Where it not really difficult was that we had the ability to save that much. My previous role allowed for lots and lots of overtime. We did give up vacations, gifts, etc but that was our choice to prioritize our money.
The uneasy part was that there was no guarantee we were going to ever use the money. Wanting to have a child is not the same as being able to have a child and we decided from the beginning that if we were unable to have a child for whatever reason we were going to spend that money on something very ridiculous. I guess in a way to deal with the sadness we might have felt.
Taking Time Off:
Luckily, and I mean that truly, because of that aggressive saving I can take 15 months off with this little one, unpaid for the last 2 months and not have to really change our spending habits all that much. This is financial privilege at its finest and I’m very aware of that. I’m not even going to end the post with something ridiculous like, “if we can do it, anyone can” because that’s a lie.
However being prepared for a child is something that is very doable. Since you have 40 weeks (likely 34-36 weeks after you get a positive pregnancy test) to get it together, even if it’s unplanned. If you are planning for this then you have even more time to think about what you want and how you can try to get that.
So things are really going to change in the Couple of Sense household in the next little bit. We are excited and happy and can’t wait to meet this little person that we have been thinking about so much since mid-October. While the idea of being new parents is terrifying (no sleep) I’m happy to start this next very cool chapter in our lives.
- We don’t know the gender
- We will keep you posted when our little one arrives, promise.